A Goddamn Angel
by AllTheWrongLoves
Summary: Life comes and goes. And sometimes heart break is left behind. But we all know our Victor Sullivan never leaves anything undone or unsaid.


**Yeah, this isn't Sullys' secret. I'm still doing it! I was just listening to this really sad song and this came up. You know, I really need to get back into deep stuff. My favorite part of writing is pulling emotions out of the reader-make 'em feel something. so, I figured I'd contribute to a very neglected friendship; Sully and Elena! :D**

It was as if the skies themselves could feel the sorrow emitting off of the air; dark, ominous clouds blocking any sign of sunlight and the threat of rain coming in a downpour at any moment. Four people stood in front of one specific headstone, each one of them in dark colors. Tears weren't shed-all their remorse and sadness could be seen just by looking at the people themselves. There was no need for tears. A blonde woman with brown eyes gazed at the headstone distantly, rubbing a taller males' back- his blue eyes glassy and near vacancy. She had never seen him so defeated as much as she did that moment; his once straight posture diminished and fiery grin destroyed into a sulk. It broke her heart. She reached up to place a sweet kiss on his neck in comfort. His sleep neglected eyes just slipped towards her for a second before sliding back to the headstone.

"I'm sorry, Nate." She whispered, the inscription on the headstone pulling at their hearts. Because the harsh, horrible reality was; Sully-her husband's best friend, mentor, _father- _was dead. Gone. It was impossible to believe what was in front of them. **'Here lies Victor Sullivan. Strong mentor, respectable man, great friend. ** It had been Nates' choice what to place on the headstone; and she couldn't agree more what he requested. She couldn't imagine how hard it was for him. He had been the last to see Sully before nature took its course and let the older man's for the first time feeble heart give up. She didn't know what was exchanged between them and that was good. They had needed to share some words. Nate had known the day was coming; he had admitted to her. Ever since he accepted Sully, he had feared the mans' death with a desperate grip on hope that it would never happen. Every scare, every fall, every single thing that took a toll on Sullys' body pushed at Nate's fears. The day he walked into that hospital room and didn't come out until a nurse rushed in saying Sullys' monitor had deadpanned; it was obvious the day had come. There was nothing more heart wrenching than finding your husband hunched over, still gripping his no longer living friends hand in a trembling mess.

The funeral was small; just her, Nate, Chloe and Cutter. Her parents had wanted to come but she knew it was just to get on Nates' case about something that had nothing to do with sympathy. Anyone with a brain knew that wouldn't end well on such an occasion. No one said verbal words. You could see their respect and love and anguish clearly on their faces. They all knew a great man was lost. She continued to rub Nates' back the longer they stood there as the first few drops of cold water plopped down.

"Elena, Charlie and I are heading back now. We'll see you two tomorrow okay? Try to bring a smile to his face. If you can." Chloe carefully murmured in Elenas' ear before the ex-fortune hunter hurried through the increasing ran towards her fiancée. Elena bit her lip and took another look at Nate. His eyes were so empty it hurt. He had lost everything that had helped him become who he was and yet…part of her thought he wasn't breaking down because of it too. Sully would never let Nate worry or hurt over him. She remained loyal and stood in the rain with Nate as they both studied the headstone, in hopes it was all a dream and they would wake up in bed to visit Sully like any other day. Again, reality was harsh. And this was real. The lump in her throat and the pain in her heart were real. Her husband nearing a cationic state was real. When her clothes became heavy and she felt cold to her very bone, she considered pulling Nate towards their car. It just crossed her mind though. She was a little surprised when Nate moved to wrap an arm around her shoulder, he himself soaked. Even with his normal movement, his eyes remained spacious and defeated.

"Come on." He breathed, brushing his fingers over the stone just once in an almost goodbye motion before steering them towards their jeep with hurried steps. The drive home was deathly silent, the patter of the rain against the windshield being the only reliever. Neither of them reached for the radio like the usually do. They just sat in the silence until the pulled up to their complex, hurrying through the rain again to enter the warm confines of their apartment. But it wasn't the same; because the warmth and the lingering scent of Elenas' cooking could only relieve a broken heart for mere moments. They didn't bother turning on the television or touch any of their favorite books-many of them given by Sully on multiple Christmases and birthdays. They both just changed into dry clothes, Nate flopping down on the bed in resignation.

"Do want something to eat?" Elena murmured and stroked the back of her hand against Nates' stubble cheek, not very surprised when she saw his eyes start to redden and become even more glassy.

"No." He choked out quietly, clenching his fist into the sheets. Elena felt her heart break once again as she watched her husband slump deep into the blankets. With a sigh she slipped out of the room, swallowing another lump when a very soft-but audible- sob came from their bedroom. 'Oh Nate…' she thought helplessly and leaned against the closed door. Nothing was going to be the same.

**XXX**

Nate had fallen asleep a time ago, having cried himself out into unconsciousness. Elena had checked up on him earlier to find him sprawled across the bed with a tear stained face and sound asleep. She had placed a sad smile on her face before she closed the door again and did the one thing she hardly ever did. Have a beer. She stepped into the cool damp air of autumn on their porch, the fresh scent of rain clearing her head as she inhaled. The clouds had moved away to show off a starry sky along with a crevice shaped moon.

She leaned against the railing and gazed at the stars, remembering Sully telling her all the constellations he knew on a night like this with the three of them were nearly drunk off their asses and half asleep. Sully had wrapped and arm around her shoulder-both of them sitting on the floor-and Nates' head in her lap. They sat like that while Sully slurred names' of stars and told their stories, using his cigar to trace their shape all through the night until they passed out. She was happy the alcohol hadn't ruined her memory of that moment.

She bit her lip as yet another lump grew in her throat. "I can just imagine you standing next to me, Sully." she whispered to the stars. "I can imagine you smoking a cigar and muttering about how Nate didn't need to act like this for you…" she scoffed. "Hell if you were here he wouldn't even be acting like this. Everything would be normal…well as normal as our life can get." She tapped her fingers against the beer can and pursed her lips. "He's a wreck." She muttered disdainly. "You meant so much to him. He misses you. I miss you." her voice cracked and she tipped the can to her lips to take a good gulp. "I swear that every memory I ever made with you two kept swishing by my eyes every second we stood in that cemetery. Every joke you ever made, every wrestling match you goons had, every…every moment that you smiled." She felt tears well up and cloud her vision. She hung her head to stare at the wet pavement below. Even with her tears, Elena gave a soft laugh.

"I still remember the one time you carried me all the way to our campsite after I sprained me ankle so Nate could fix me up. You kept cracking jokes about how light and tiny I was. I was so embarrassed." She tugged at her bun-a habit she developed to calm herself. Her chest was tightening from all the memories swarming in her mind. "You became a small wonder in my life. You and Nate. The two of you were just…the best part of my day. Nate still is but…things are different now. They'll be an empty space in both of us because of you being gone." Elena tried to blink away the tears and took another drink of her beer, the cool air feeling nice against her reddening cheeks. It was a little foolish talking to no one. Yet at the same time it felt nice to pretend Sully was there. She couldn't make a habit of it. It felt nice getting it all off her chest-though she would have loved to actually say to his face.

"I wish you were here. So much." She whimpered, the tears finally leaking down her face in a steady stream.

"Aww-sweetheart you're pullin' at my heart strings." Elenas' heart skipped a beat at the all too familiar voice. Reflex had her spinning around and forgetting all about the can in her hand to hopefully meet the face that was in her mind. She gave a tiny squeal as a blur whizzed by, a hand catching her can with agile ease.

"Whoop. Be careful." Elenas' heart surely stopped as she met a pair of grey eyes and a sweet smile paired with a mustache. This couldn't be real. She must have fallen asleep on the porch again. The two stood in utters silence while Elena tried to find her voice and was thankful when the figure backed up enough for her to confirm her assumption.

"S-Sully?" Sully grinned and raised his arms.

"The one and only." Elena suddenly felt light headed and leaned against the railing-her hand resting on her chest.

"You're…alive!" She exclaimed. The face that Sully made said otherwise. It was his look for when Nate was on the right track of something but was taking a while to get the details. It was a 'you're half right' look.

"Ah-alive isn't really the word. Am I breathing? Yeah. But there's a small flaw." He patted his chest. "No heartbeat." He ran a hand down his arm. "And no blood going through my veins." He stated with the smallest bit of sadness in his gaze. Elena bit her lip and studied Sully to see the few things she hadn't in her excitement. He was paler than he had been when he was alive-a little healthier looking though. But the real giveaway was that ever so slightly, he was translucent. So if Elena squinted really hard, she could see through him.

"So what are you? Are you a ghost?" it was a playful question. And it appeared Sully understood when he chuckled and moved to stand next to her.

"Mmm, not really. I guess-on a level- I'm an angel."

"An angel." She repeated in astonishment, looking for any sign of the image of an angel people believed. But Sully had no wings. No halo. Just the clothes on his back and the grin on his face.

"Yeah. They must be pretty loose on rules if they let a guy like me in there." Elena scoffed in disagreement. Only Sully would believe he didn't belong somewhere everyone else _knew _he belonged.

"Why would you say 'on a level?" Sully took a breath like he was buying time to think.

"Well I'm what they call a common angel. I'm a soul who has found peace but had committed things that eliminated my purity. Such as my years of treasure hunting. Then there are higher levels from me to the highest level angels." Elena nodded. She honestly had nothing to say. Just a minute ago she had believed she would never see Sully like she was right now; talking, smiling. Just him in general.

"Why are you here, then? If you're a soul at rest wouldn't that mean you have no need to be on earth?" Sully chuckled and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. That one little motion made Elena want to cry again. Sully was somehow just as warm now as he had been alive-the weight of his arm against her shoulders so comfortable, she truly believed she was dreaming.

"Every angel-after death and being welcomed-gets a few hours on earth to say official goodbyes or make amends with family and friends." He turned to smile at her. "I came to say my goodbyes." The word goodbye it Elena right in the heart. Goodbye. A hard sobbed wracked her shoulders as she practically leapt into Sullys' embrace, slinking her arms around him and holding for dear life-every ounce of her strength she had used for Nate draining away. Her senses were invaded with Sullys' scent; cigar smoke and pine trees from the cologne he used. The warmth of his cheek against the top of her head only made her heart ache more. For the first time she could remember, Elena Drake wept with everything in her.

Sully held her without saying a word, rubbing her back and resting his forehead against the top of hers. It felt so real, so familiar that Elena found herself clutching closer as if Sullys' heart would jump start and he would be back if she just kept hugging him tighter. But that's not how the world worked is it? Sully would be gone after this. In a better place.

"Elena…" he murmured and placed a finger under her chin to lift her face to his. "You won't believe how big of an impact on my life you and Nate made. You two opened my eyes to things I never dreamed of. You're the spunkiest shorty I know and you make Nate so happy it's goddamn ridiculous. My time with you and Nate was indescribable. There were days when all I wanted was to keep going just to have more of those days. I guess all the crap I went through over the years finally caught up." Elena lifted her head a little to give Sully a watery smile.

"Look all I'm trying to say is-I love ya, Elena. You're fun and sweet and yes, you have a wicked right hook. You're the other half of Nate and I'm glad you two are together." Elena gave a weak laugh, more tears brimming as Sully moved his hands to her shoulders to give them a gentle squeeze.

"I'll be watching over you two. Keep living and no matter how cliché it sounds-I'll always be in your hearts." Elena smiled.

"Thank you Sully. For everything." She whispered. Sully gave his own smile, both their heads turning when a noise came from the apartment.

"Elena?" A groggy sounding Nate called. Elena flicked her eyes to Sully for a moment.

"Out on the porch." She responded. When Nate's footsteps started to move closer, Sullys' hands released her shoulders and she felt his mustache tickle her ear.

"Take care of him." he murmured before he turned to leave, pausing to hold a finger as something registered his memory with large importance.

"Oh, and-"he turned to set a hand on her stomach with a joyous smile. "Congratulations." He whispered. Elena widened her eyes when she put his words together. A baby. He smiled once more and vanished without a trace just as Nate opened their sliding door to the porch.

"Hey." She greeted and kissed his jaw. She was happy to see a tired smile pass his lips and his arm slink around her waist.

"Hey. How long have you been out here?" Elena realized she didn't know! How long had she and Sully been out there? She had no idea. So she shrugged in a casual laziness.

"Not long. Do you feel a little better?" She scanned his face for any sign of lack of sleep that had been there earlier that day.

"Yeah. I feel a little refreshed."

"Better enough to eat something?" She inquired, patting his stomach. He gave a weak grin and nodded. The grin faded when he saw her own tears still on her face.

"You okay?" he asked and stroked his fingers across her wet and flushed face.

"Yeah! Yeah, I'm fine." She assured and placed her hand over his. "Just've been thinking." He bobbed his head to the side and clasped their hands together. It was a silent blissful habit between them. Holding hands was an innocent and favorite way to say 'I love you.'

"Okay then. C'mon. I'll just order us something." She let Nate pull her out of the cool air into their apartment, only stopping when Nate turned to skeptically look at her again.

"You're sure you're alight?" She rolled her eyes and nodded, used to Nate double checking things like that.

"Yes! I'm fine." She glanced over her shoulder to see Sully balancing on the railing, giving her a wink before he disappeared again. She grinned with genuine happiness and contentment in her heart. "I'm just fine." She murmured and trotted after Nate into the living room.

"So, Chinese or pizza?"

**Cheeeeeeeeezy! ;A; ugh! I feel so weird writing something deep again. Well as deep as someone like me can get. I nearly cried writing this. Seriously. So part of me thinks that Sully would definitely visit to say his goodbyes if something like this happened. I bet you're thinking, why didn't he visit Nate? Simple. Sully said everything he could before he passed. You never know-I might ass a few chapters here and there. Nothing concrete though. I needed to get this off my chest before it drove me nuts so…love it, hate it. All that jazz**


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